I have faced stress all my life, so I learned to deal with all the different forms of stress. I used to do commercial remodeling for a real estate company. I was always stressed out dealing with the work and the fact that this company always wanted the job finished before the tenant was ready to pay the lease. I found out that no matter how much you stress yourself out the job will not get done any quicker. I was so stressed some days that I would lose my temper when the slightest thing would go wrong on the job. I had to learn to leave the job and the problems at work and forget about it for the night.

I took so much stress home with me that some nights I would not sleep at all just worrying about how to make the job go quicker. I believe that I learned to let go of the stress of work by just taking the time to sit down in some restaurant,have a cup of coffee, then just talk to the people about other subjects. This will allow time to relax; the jobs and stress will be there tomorrow. I found that I had a bad habit of talking about everything that would go wrong on the job. I know that I had to get my mind on other subjects. This would get me talking about anything from sports to politics. I always found to have less stress, I had to leave the job at work. I Take time to make sure to let go of what ever is stressing me out at the time. Carrying stress around all the time is not healthy; just let it go for a time and relax.

Job commitment was my entire life for so many years that I would work one hundred hours a week. I was so committed to my job that I would take off only three holidays a year. I was so committed to making as much money as I could that I lost so many years just working that I hardly ever had a personal life. I worked for so long because I was so poor as a kid I thought that I would make up for every thing that I never had growing up. I worked for years and barely dated because there was never enough time and I could not make enough money. I was so committed to my job and work, one of my dates actually called me a machine. Money and work are important in life, so take the time to have balance in everything done in life. I turned around years later and found that for years I never took time to live. I have missed out on so much of life I think that there has to be balance to happy.

I have had so much anger in my life that I finally had nowhere to put the anger any more. I have always been so short tempered. Some one just had to look at me the wrong way and I would start cussing and screaming at them. Some days I would just take my anger out on any one that said something I did not like. I found that I was ridiculing people just because my life was so boring and empty. When you work all the hours and years that I did, the job became the most important part of my life. Jobs go wrong so I was always angry. I have had more screaming matches then I can count. I had to learn to let go of my anger because I was always hostile to many people that did not deserve this. I know now some thirty five years later that being angry all the time will make your life very lonely. Every person gets mad at some time, just learn to let it go or walk away until you have control of your anger. I took so long to realize that anger and abuse never solves anything. Controlling anger is hard to do, just take the time to count to ten or take several deep breaths then think about what you are going the say before talking.

I lost out on love as I worked so hard that I never took the time to let some girl love me. I have had so many bad times with the women I have had in my life. I have always had this need to be in control of every aspect of my life. I let all the women walk away from me and I did nothing to stop them. I Was always walking away from starting a commitment because I was so afraid that I would have to commit to some one and that scared the hell out of me. I was not willing to get married or have children because I had nothing when I was a kid I did not want to see any child or wife of mine always struggling to just live. I always believed that there would be time to work on life and marriage that some thirty years and several good women have come and gone out of my life. Until I realized that to be happy you have to have people in your life even if there are hard times. I have found that time is so short in life that when you do not take time to love and be loved That I lost out on the only real important thing you need to be happy that is hearing some one tell you I love you. Take the time to live love and be happy or life will pass by before you know it.

I have suffered from depression most of my adult life. I have had days at a time where I would not eat or sleep days would turn into weeks and months. I would feel bad for weeks at a crack. My mind would struggle just to find a reason to get out of bed in the morning. I always felt like there was no future for me in times that I was so depressed. I would suffer from anxiety attacks. I would shake like the world was coming apart. I always felt cold and clammy when I suffered through a bout of depression. These are the only times in my life I did not work. I was always afraid that some one would see right through me. I know all about dealing with depression you think things that I would not normally think about. I believe that when I was so down like this I would always keep telling myself that these thoughts are not the way I would normally think. I never felt more alone then when I was depressed. depression is hard to over come even with medication. I will say this: to survive you must realize that these thoughts you are suffering through are not real. Always realize that depression makes people think only about the bad times and bad thoughts.

I have found over the years that I must always realize that I am a fighter and a survivor and no matter how hopeless it seems at the time I have to fight to change this thought pattern to think as I would normally think. I know that better days are ahead so think about the good times and let go of the bad. I finally realized that you have to forgive your self for every thing. Hold on to life and always realize that you are important and count as a person. Never let any one convince you that are less then you really are. I Know that there are hard times for people always realize that no one is not and important person.

I hope that every one who feels alone and hopeless understands that your life is the most precious gift that you have so love your self and be all that you can be. I took a long time to learn that all life has value just look for it.

As always I write with respect.

My name is Mike Carvell of the voice. I hope that this will be read by all publishers and that they agree with me that we need a voice for change. I believe that if we all work together, we can change so many problems that face our country today. I believe that if you put your column and respect on the line that we can all make this column a voice for all people, I mean all people. Tell me what you want changed and I will keep this column honest direct and to the point with the commitment you need to affect change. Once again, I need your respect, help, and commitment to make this accomplishment possible. I not only believe in all Americans but the rights and respect of you all to make this commitment for which I will write with all honesty and respect and power that I can to prove this to you.

This is my column and only my column I will do all the writing with respect to all those of you who put your trust and commitment into this column now and in the future. I will write columns, as many as I can, on as many subjects that I can with respect for all my future work.

Thank you,

Mike Carvell as always.

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